Yummy Brunch

So as usually happens on the weekends, when I wake up, it’s time for me to decide what to make for lunch (I don’t have kids and love sleep so I often sleep in on the weekends and D usually gets up earlier than me).  Sunday is food shopping today so the supplies are a bit depleted.  After looking I decided we would have spinach and feta omelets with toasted flat bread (better for you than regular bread).  Now usually when I make omelets they are burnt, they don’t stay together, something goes wrong.  Today I started by tearing most of the stems off the spinach and putting all of it into a small fry pan (no oil) over med-high heat.

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I’ve lived in the Far East and I’ve never seen filth like it…

I have nothing against rats. I think they are cute, charming, intelligent creatures that make very good pets.

The issue is with a former neighbour, when Bahkti and I lived in Hoole, a suburb of Chester. We noticed that one day the alley at the back of the house appeared much cleaner than usual. It had never been a particularly dirty alley, but suddenly it was almost clean enough to eat from. We sometimes saw that there were bubbles from detergents foaming from the drains. It all seemed very public-spirited at first.

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This has nothing to do with Gollum

I think that the Lord of the Rings trilogy is one of the most boring things ever written. I didn’t like it one little bit. Okay, so I’ve just alienated you and about two-thirds of the English-speaking world, but so what? It’s all to do with the word, which makes me (and a number of other people) to rush at each other in a frenzy of somewhat camp stroking.

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We think we’ve got hens in the skirting-board…

Chickens are the most stupid creatures on the planet

Well, that’s my opinion and I’m always right! When I was a child, we lived close to a chicken farm and the wretched animals were always escaping. Despite having their wings clipped, the could still over the fence around the farm and, occasionally, over the fence into our garden. It happened so often that our dog, Bengo, reacted to the word “chickens” by running to the French windows, barking. He would chase them from the garden. One once tried to run through the chain-link fence into next door’s garden and got stuck, being unable to back out because its feathers got stuck. Our neighbour had to get gloves and hold the feathers down whilst pushing its head back through. Stupidity!

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Spiders and waff-waffs and eeps, oh no…

Some things are funny for reasons I can’t explain. Suddenly I’ll look at something in a slightly different way and it will seem utterly hilarious. One day, Bahkti and I were sitting in the bath and I spotted a bottle of dog shampoo. On the label was a picture of a spaniel, one which did not look as if it wanted to be bathed. It appeared to be mouthing the sound waff, with the implicit meaning “don’t you dare bring that shampoo toward me”. I already had a private joke about spaniels (which I can’t explain here, unfortunately) and suddenly they became the second most miserable thing in the world.

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