Those three little words. I love you.
They pack more punch than an old man stuffed to the brim with Metamucil, bran kibble and prune juice when he’s having trouble going through the motions. And when our guy says these three itsy bitsy teeny tiny words, we get all warm, all choked and worked up, and totally willing to do whatever, including removing our dignity, our pubic hair and our drawls.
Women LOVE to lament in when the first occasion occurred that dude said “I love you” and you can ask any woman and she’ll tell you the precise time, day, and hour down to the effing clock strike when her guy first told her he loved her. I know, because I used to do this myself.
I’ve been there a few times with lovers of the past. I can still hear those perfect little words ringing in my ear as if they’re being said right now, right here, over and over again. WOMEN LOVE TO HEAR THAT SHIT and for some reason we effing fall like fools for it every single time.
Even if the guy is drunk, in jail or has been living with some chick all along- we believe it because love is something great enough to believe in.
Why do we, women especially, put major stock in words instead of actions? Why do we insist on believing it every time we hear it?
Well it’s simple really. Women foolishly buy the words “I love you” like they’re being sold a souped up piece of crap Pacer on it’s last leg because it’s a “classic”. Yeah, it’s a classic alright. A classic hook, line, sinker. And a “see you later” because the guy’s a jerk anyway. But he said it didn’t he?
However, in my experience, MEN GENERALLY DON’T PLAY AROUND WITH THE “LOVE” WORD UNLESS THERE’S A HINT OF TRUTH TO IT. I mean, why would they? Men can barely hold a straight face in telling women they want to continue dating, much less utter three little words that are the damned near equivalent of getting a chick knocked up.
However, no beans, some guys will lie if it means getting them the leverage, the leeway, and the license to be an asshat. But I’ve found most of the time, if dude’s saying it, he means it at least somewhat.
So how do I know if he’s lying or telling the truth, and how do I know the right context in which to believe him?
He means it if he’s saying it before he’s even mentioned to you what color he thinks your nipples are. He doesn’t if he’s says it while he’s looking at them.
Guys love to have sex. So do us girls. And love can easily become part of the passionate, fantastical fantasy when we’re in the heat of the moment. I’ve succumbed to orgasmic delight in hearing a man tell me he loved me during foreplay, in the animalistic act and basking and shaking in the afterglow. It’s all part of the grandeur and the perfection and the desirous contextual significance of a super sexy sexual encounter.
However, I’ve been lied to and I knew it because the guy treated me like dog crap every other minute we spent outside the bedroom. He said he loved me while I opened my thighs and not sooner than I could open my eyes.
I find that if a guy REALLY LOVES YOU, HE’S GOING TO SAY IT WHEN YOU LOOK YOUR UGLIEST, WHEN YOU’RE AT YOUR MADDEST, AND WHEN YOUR DRAWLS AREN’T WRAPPED AROUND YOUR ANKLES.
He’ll say it over the phone in the middle of being interrupted at work, he’ll tell you in a card nestled in some flowers on your birthday, and he’ll tell you in the morning before he goes outside to warm up your car.
He’ll say it AND MEAN IT when the time, place and context are completely irrelevant.
He means it if he’s says it in front of a room full of his dearest friends and family members. He doesn’t when he barely muffles it reeking of booze behind a dimly lit wall at the corner dive bar.
A lot of women want to get the guy sprung. And they think the way to do that is to splay out their rear end when he wants it, when he needs it and when it’s convenient for him. They try to act like they got the upper hand and convince themselves they do by going out, meeting dudes and promising the ass if the guy can walk a thick line along the labor of love.
They think “wow, this guy really likes me if he’s called me up, of all people, tonight and invites me out for drinks. Even though he’s drunk, he said he loves me so he must. Since he said it, I’ll give him what he wants“. Needless to say, THESE DUMB BROADS KNOW THEY’RE GOING TO GIVE IT UP ANYWAY.
Reminds me of this reality show I was watching where the chick was hell bent on getting married and was “patiently” waiting for the right guy. At the same time, she was seeing a douchebag who told her he wasn’t looking for anything serious, didn’t want commitment, and he was very much satisfied with their FWB, no questions asked arrangement. After he laid it all out to her, she argued with him and told him it wasn’t okay, and was essentially pressuring him into considering more. He did however bend a bit and say that he “loved” her and valued their friendship, just enough to keep her engine on idle.
After this meaningless conversation, they take a weekend getaway and she does up the whore thing with the wigs and the nasty outfits (far from the innocent wifey material she wants to portray herself) and plays the nasty little freak for him all weekend. SHE STILL GIVES UP THE ASS THINKING IT’S GOING TO GET HIM TO DO WHAT SHE WANTS. Unsurprisingly, they arrive back home only to break up.
This guy didn’t lie but he wasn’t fully honest either. He could’ve done the upstanding thing and told her he wanted nothing more to do with her and cut her off instead of taking her on a weekend trip and f*cking her silly until she couldn’t see straight.
This guy is the equivalent of the drunk douching it up at the dive bar. He said he loved her to get what was convenient for him at the time. Then he ditched her after the erection wore down and the blood reentered his brain.
If the ass is the only thing hanging around in the backdrop of the relationship, and there is no other basis upon which to build a relationship, HE IS LYING WHEN HE SAYS HE LOVES YOU.
He means it when he says it when he shows up on time, talks about taking it to the next level of exclusivity and wants to be near you every spare minute he can. He doesn’t when he calls at 2am, comes by, cums on the sheets and cuts.
Just like the dumb hag listed above, she put pseudo-hope into a sexual relationship under the assumption that if she wiggles her ass just right, the dude is going to get not only wound up, but wrapped up in love, commitment, and is going to pull down 11 stars for her from the heavens above.
Guys don’t blur the lines of strict ass and real love. Women need to get with it that if a guy only shows up in order to get the ass, makes booty calls, and doesn’t want to know shit about anything else that’s going on in their lives, HE IS NOT IN LOVE. Sex is very powerful and the oxytocin is like a drug that makes us delusional to the point of self-denial and foolish psychosis.
If he’s only hanging around for sex, he is only hanging around for sex whether he lies and says he loves you or not.
So how do you know if a guy really loves you?
- When he truly cares about the things you care about.
- When he truly cares about your feelings and your welfare.
- When he shows up when you’re sick, need a friend, or have a problem.
- When he spends quality time with you outside of showing off your rear end.
- When he gives you an engagement ring and makes a date.
- When he is willing to talk real commitment, not talk his way out of it.
- When he makes it known to all the people in his life that are important to him, that you’re the one for him.
- When the only excuses he’s making are to his friends because he’s no longer willing to ditch you to hang out with them.
- When nothing else in the world matters to him but being with you.
And finally the guy really loves you when:
He sticks around indefinitely NO MATTER WHAT. NOT JUST WHEN YOU AGREE TO GIVE UP THE ASS.
You may also like:
- A Decent Girl For a Nice Guy
- Man Skank: And No It’s Not a Cologne
- Be a Lady and He’ll Treat You Like One
- The Guy Just Doesn’t Give Up
- Chasing Dudes is Desperate Lame and Pathetic